I took a rather nice bath today. It was so relaxing.

It's so hot and miserable. I may just die from a heat stroke. It's not often that I feel gross, but I definitely do right now. I actually want a bath. I wonder if I could sneak one in the master's tub...

So Master, what ever happened to that threat of bathing?

My birthday was a few days ago... It made me think of them. I hate my birthday. Who celebrates the birth of something that isn't even human?

Life has been... boring. I want to rip my hair out. Everyone here is so damn boring! Well, except Gaara, but I haven't seen much of him lately.

I'm not used to being such a good girl. If I didn't think he would murder me for it, I would being acting out in some way. Damn, that makes me sound like such a child.

Though I did hear Gaara ranting about some woman from Gaul. It was rather amusing. I would love to meet this woman who has so royally pissed off my dear master. She sounds like someone who after my own heart.

So I had an encounter in the market the other day with that soldier by the name of Uchiha. He's an odd guy... And rude too! Though I suppose I'm not much better.

I'm really surprised Master let me out of the villa on my own. It makes me a little suspicious.

By Jupiter, does he annoy me! But at the same time, I'm intrigued. Which annoys me more. I've never cared at all about my masters unless it was to contemplate their deaths, but I want to know what makes this one tick. Maybe I'm just some freak who likes dangerous things. After all, it seems like trying to kill him is safer than getting to know him.

Also, I hate that little slave from Gaul! I hope she drowns in her precious master's bath water!

As I am in the presence of this man... Gaara, I find myself thinking of my mother more and more. Not because he reminds me of her, but because he brings out a part of myself that reminds me of her. She was diligent and beautiful, she was loving. She was things I can't ever hope to be. Her fault was that she was trusting. She trusted a man, and he let her down. He let me down. I didn't really know him in the way a daughter usually knows her father, but that let down hurt me as well.

The other night when... When I had the misfortune of bathing Gaara, my thoughts flew to her. To how much pain she must have been in. Over the years, my respect for her has dwindled, mostly due to reputation. That night, however, I remembered her as I knew her, and I felt empathetic towards her. What happened to me... it is not the same. She had it worse.

Damn it! Those damned whip marks have come open again.

Master has been muttering to himself more lately. I believe he is plotting to get rid of me. His suspicion of me is higher since he has recovered from his illness he contracted last month. I have not been allowed anywhere near the kitchen since that incident.

I can not believe it did not work. The man said that the stuff was strong. I had to steal a large sum of money to get it too. Either Master is built like an elephant (which wouldn't surprise me as he is as big as one) or he has worked up immunities to many poisons.

I was a fool to try poison. Next time I won't make that mistake... Unless I'm sold before I get another chance.